Most times
breaking up in a relationship is something nobody gets to plan when they are
going into a relationship, it just hits! And when it does it hurts so badly.
Many people who would have achieved a lot in their lives never made head ways
after a breakup or heartbreak. The truth is, you just have to move on. For most
people, this is not as easy as it sounds, especially when commitments have been
made and it seems as though this will be the end of a dream, a plan, or even a
life.
For such I
will like to take sides with you, you have the right to feel bad, cry, and
isolate yourself. But don’t stay there. It may be your fault, you made a
mistake, or you thought it wasn't going to come to this, but it’s done anyway
you have to start accepting the truth: It’s Over. He/she is not to you who they
are anymore, they still exist in the world but for some reasons you people
can’t stick to each other anymore. If your friends, family and other counterparts
ask too many questions, answer the ones you can, ignore the ones you can. Focus
on getting back to life.
There a few
ways I know can help you get over heartbreak in a short while:
Forgiveness: Heartbreak may have been caused by
one of you, you or your partner. If it is your fault, you need to forgive
yourself and let it go. If it was your partner you need to forgive and let it
go. Forgiveness helps you forget what it was that happened and learn from it.
When you forgive you are simply saying, “I have experienced that stage and I
have crossed it.” You don’t necessarily need to let your ex know he/she is
forgiven, just know it yourself and tell people that ask you too.
Accept the Result: Was the relationship awesome? Was it
worth the while? Or was it a bad one? Was your partner a nice person? Was
he/she good to you? Accept the truth. Also tell people when they ask you don’t
lie about the relationship because it is no more. The idea is if you lie about
it means you never really had enough of it and can desire it again, but if you
are truthful about it you will begin to accept the new life the way it is.
Enjoy the Memories: Most people are of the opinion that
when you have broken up with someone you have to forget them entirely. I say
that’s not being fair to you. How do you forget some sweet times of your life,
what do you look up to? Enjoy the memories that you can remember, try to play
them out in your new life. Now am not saying isolate yourself and dwell on
memories: when they come to reflect, smile and move on. This way you will be telling
your sub-consciousness that it is the past and it is gone.
Tell Someone: Amongst your friends there are people
that may sympathize with you on the matter, may be your family, or a passerby
that showed concern. Don’t carry the burden alone, share. As you share you will
see your mistakes and straighten up your ways. You will also give someone a
chance to have your experience.
Improve your life: This is the part I love most. After a
break up become better. Move higher than you were. Some stay down and wallow in
pain, sometimes they even try to catch the attention of the ex to show they are
affected by the break up. It’s not necessary. Make something good with your
life. Discover new ways of living, this is the time to take up that job, if you
can buy new clothes, start that business, and engage yourself in that talent.
Wake up! Become new!
Make New Friends: Open up to people that come to you as
friends. By this I don’t mean intimate friends, I mean casual friends of same
sex. Go outing with them, have fun, have another experience of life. Be free of
the past.
Love Again: Now when someone comes and you are
attracted and love sparks again, just grab it. Give in to it, having learnt
from the past, start again. Never think it will be the same. Life has started
again…
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